(no subject)

[iniquiticity]

Anonymous asked
Greenhouse verse: Since Alex is (somewhat?) younger than George it's possible that he has a more voracious appetite for sex than George does - or maybe it's just a personality thing. Either way, what happens when Alex feels like his needs aren't being met OR George worries that he isn't satisfying his husband?

hamilton was furiously writing some pamphlet when washington knocked on the door. hamilton grunted, which indicated that washington could come in; he was well-accustomed to hamilton not looking up to greet him. of course, this time perhaps it meant something, although he knew in all seriousness it had never meant something; hamilton was the sort that paid attention to what he did and how it looked in only specific circumstances somehow. washington wished he had the ability to enter some private space and become a different person.

he sat down in the chair opposite hamilton’s study desk and studied the man for a moment, trying to squash the rising anxiety in his throat. there was no success to be had: the anxiety inched itself down his stomach and through his arms and legs until he felt a long-suppressed urge to fidget rise. he ignored it the best he could, but he knew hamilton well, and if had not looked up by now, no one knew when he would pull himself from his essay.

“lord hamilton,” washington said, and forced himself still and even. hamilton looked up at him, mind clearly still in his work. “if i might have your attention.”

“yes, what can i assist with?” hamilton asked, quickly. washington’s eyes flicked to the quill in his hand; hamilton sighed, and put it back in the inkwell, folding his fingers together over the half-written essay.

“I might —” he said, and the anxiety struck, tangling in the base of his spine and all the way up his head, lodging between his mind and the words he had written, studied, disposed of, written, studied, disposed. “there is some difference in our age – i think that might– that…. your desires are…..” hamilton watching him with brow furrowed now. “–that i might not desire the same satisfaction, as often, as much - as yourself.”

hamilton blinked at him for a few moments, processing this. then his husband covered his mouth with his hand as he thought, and washington could not even imagine what the man considered.

“you mean to say that you are concerned that i am unhappy becuase i am voracious, and you are not?” hamilton asked.

that was a good word. “yes, something of that matter. it hardly seems fair, that you might always rush to my aid, whereas i—am not always capable, be that physically or mentally.”

“how do you manage to always attend to things this ridiculous?” hamilton asked.

“it is not ridiculous for you to be unfulfilled,” washington replied, although it was a perfectly hamilton sort of answer, and dissolved some of his fear. “but– i would not be opposed if you were to seek other arms… lord laurens, or…”

“i want your arms,” hamilton said, petulantly. he stood and stalked around the desk, dumping himself into washington’s lap inelegantly and tracing the buttons of his waistcoat. “i could run into john’s arms if i liked. but i do not, and i shall not. when you shall have me, i shall be had - otherwise, i shall have myself.”

“that seems very unfair,” washington said, but he folded his arms around hamilton nontheless, and tilted his head to kiss him.

“what is so unfair about it? that i have acquired the most impressive lover in the country, only he cannot be permanently at my beck and call like a cat in heat?”

washington shook his head. “you should not distract me with flattery. you understand my complaint.”

“you are being upset about things you cannot control, sir,” hamilton said, and he pushed the waistcoat off washington’s form and into the chair without a complaint. “i shall be much more upset if you become distraught over something i have told you not to worry about, that is about me, and my concern. if i remove myself from your lap, are you to mope about only being the best in most circumstances, and not all?”

hamilton kissed him, longer this time, sliding his tongue into his mouth. washington studied him, when they separated. “you shall allow me to assist?”

“only if you will cease your pouting. and these fears i shall abandon you for another should be done away with just as well.”

washington allowed himself to be undressed. the anxiety still sat like a brick, but at least a smaller brick, and weight half-born by another.

“very well,” he replied, “i shall no longer pout.”

“good,” hamilton said, and grinned at him, “because i would much prefer your mouth to kiss me, than otherwise.”