(no subject)

[iniquiticity]

malapertqueen asked
Fuck this anon thing, let's talk more about ironflint Alex and his deeply cherished love of glory holes

there are very few things that alex would exchange for glory holes. like if you were like “you can either never be drunk or never kneel in front of a glory hole” he would give up drinking in a heartbeat. he would really give a up a lot of things over glory holes.

the thing is that glory holes sum up all the things ironflint alex is about: sucking dick, being used, having anonymous sex with an extremely low chance of intimacy, and an extremely efficient use of time. no foreplay required. just kneel down, suck a fucking dick, go home. it’s perfect. alex is a busy guy and he doesn’t have time for kisses.

also alex probably has a glory hole blog where he blogs about all his glory holes and which ones he likes the most. he has a glory hole rating system (amount of dicks in glory hole, quality of dicks in glory hole, cleanliness of glory hole, cleanliness of glory hole location) where the best glory holes are. (for reference: his favorite glory hole city is geneva, switzerland; his least favorite glory hole city is bangalore, india.) the glory hole blog also has an informed commentariat that discusses their own dick-sucking experience.

he’s taken great effort to disguise himself from the blog. disguises his WHOIS info, spoofs his contact email, uses a VPN and shit. also VICE asks him to do an interview and he refers them to the faq:

1.who are you?
i like sucking dick and i travel for work.

2.will you suck my dick?
i probably already have.

3. if i find out who you are, will you suck my dick?
if you come up to me and announce to me that i am the writer of this blog, i will suck your dick, and then no one will ever hear from you ever again.

4. why did you start a glory hole blog?
none of my friends wanted to hear about my glory hole opinions, and i have a lot of opinions. also let me suck bad dick in bad glory holes so you don’t have to. think about it as a public service.

5. i am a bar or restaurant owner and i really don’t like this representation of my establishment on your disgusting blog.
you should probably patch the holes in your bathroom walls. but i will remove complaining restaurants and bars on request. hit the “contact us” button.

6.something about jesus/sin/heaven/god/i molest children.
i recommend my “glory hole 101″ post. (also children generally have very small dicks, and are not good for sucking.)


ironflint alex’s glory hole blog is like my main reason for living now. whoops