ocular misc cuts 2
Jan. 26th, 2016 01:29 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
iniquiticityi went through a lot of versions of what The Look laf gives ham when he's Wise Lafayetting on him for a while. I wasn't sure what I wanted it to be, although I definitely wanted something in a relationship context, and I wanted it to be a wise thought.
originally it was jealousy because laurens is so close and adrienne is so far away, and it's a contradiction becuase of course ham can't love laurens openly but laf can pine for adrienne as much as he wants. but i cut this bit out becuase i felt they were straying from the topic of the chapter, and i didn't want laf to become the focus of it. it was only after i rewrote this bit a few times (this was the best version), that i realized i wanted laf's bit to be concern that ham would accidentally out himself, which is where the present version of this chapter comes from.
Joy, and jealousy.
That his man was so close, while Adrienne was months across the sea.
Laurens could attend to him while he was ill; Adrienne would not even know, unless the illness was severe, and by the time she learned, he would have been recovered or dead. That Laurens could laugh at his jokes immediately, and Adrienne would never know them.
“Were I to have the power to bring her here, so that she might knit socks and mend shirts next to Mrs. Washington, I would do so in an instant,” Alexander said, gently.
“I know,” Lafayette replied, and he looked at his his lap, his hands fidgeting around a half-sliced apple. “I miss her terribly. I cannot explain how painful it is to be without her, for so long, and so far. I miss France like my heart has gone from my chest.”
Alexander touched a hand to his friend’s shoulder and looked into his glistening eyes. “I am not your wife or your country. But I will be the best friend I am capable of.”
Lafayette offered him a sad smile, then took a breath and steeled his features. “As I said, to come here was not optional. I am doing what I must do, as all men of integrity must When this task is finished, I will return to my comforts.” A hesitant pause. “I apologize; I did not wish to overtake your discussion with my woes that cannot be resolved by complaints.”
“It is only human to miss everything you are familiar with,” Alexander replied. “An apology is not required.”
originally it was jealousy because laurens is so close and adrienne is so far away, and it's a contradiction becuase of course ham can't love laurens openly but laf can pine for adrienne as much as he wants. but i cut this bit out becuase i felt they were straying from the topic of the chapter, and i didn't want laf to become the focus of it. it was only after i rewrote this bit a few times (this was the best version), that i realized i wanted laf's bit to be concern that ham would accidentally out himself, which is where the present version of this chapter comes from.
Joy, and jealousy.
That his man was so close, while Adrienne was months across the sea.
Laurens could attend to him while he was ill; Adrienne would not even know, unless the illness was severe, and by the time she learned, he would have been recovered or dead. That Laurens could laugh at his jokes immediately, and Adrienne would never know them.
“Were I to have the power to bring her here, so that she might knit socks and mend shirts next to Mrs. Washington, I would do so in an instant,” Alexander said, gently.
“I know,” Lafayette replied, and he looked at his his lap, his hands fidgeting around a half-sliced apple. “I miss her terribly. I cannot explain how painful it is to be without her, for so long, and so far. I miss France like my heart has gone from my chest.”
Alexander touched a hand to his friend’s shoulder and looked into his glistening eyes. “I am not your wife or your country. But I will be the best friend I am capable of.”
Lafayette offered him a sad smile, then took a breath and steeled his features. “As I said, to come here was not optional. I am doing what I must do, as all men of integrity must When this task is finished, I will return to my comforts.” A hesitant pause. “I apologize; I did not wish to overtake your discussion with my woes that cannot be resolved by complaints.”
“It is only human to miss everything you are familiar with,” Alexander replied. “An apology is not required.”